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score 1/10
To start this off I want to let everyone know this is my first review, so please bear with me and I'll do my best to bring you a good review.
I was excited for this movie for two reasons. One because of Keanu Reeves, I mean who wouldn't be excited to see him after thoroughly enjoying John Wick and I wanted to see if he could keep climbing back up to the popularity he used to have. The second reason was that the trailer looked quite interesting when I saw it, really made me want to see it.
The problem is it's another one of those movies that we've seen before where the only interesting parts of the movie have already been shown to you in the trailer. The story just seems to have no substance and the characters are just not fleshed out at all, not to mention there really is no Horror or Thrills as the genre listing would show. I admit there's mystery, but not in a good way.
**********SPOILER WARNING**********
This whole story is bonkers, the girls that show up at Evan's (Keanu's character) door end up seducing him after his repeated attempts to stave them off and a whole series of weird stuff happens. They overstay their welcome and claim they're underage so that Evan won't call the police, which is completely dropped 4 minutes later when he actually does call the police and one of the girls hangs up his phone and just asks for a ride home. After Evan is back home, he hears a noise and decides to check what it was, always a good idea, right? They knock him out of course and start having some sick fun with him like recording him having sex with one of the girls while she's dressed in his daughter's clothes. Then after an escape attempt Evan's incapacitated by a fork stab to the shoulder, oh yeah he had surgery on his shoulder, the opening of the movie makes sure you know that. They then tie him up in a chair and play a gameshow they called "Who wants to be a pedophile?" furthering the supposed belief that they are underage, so I just gotta kinda roll with it here even though they don't look anything like they're underage.
The acting by Keanu through the whole rest of the movie is pretty bad, like when he gets an answer wrong during the gameshow he gets a loud high pitched squeal played in his ears via headphones, which I don't know why he didn't just shake his head and make them fall off but oh well. He says "stop stop stop, my ears my ears, I'll go deaf I'll go deaf" in the most unbelievable way possible, doesn't sound like he's in any pain whatsoever. The rest is actually pretty boring, Luis (guy coming to pick up a sculpture that Evan's wife made for exhibit) dies after tripping and hitting his head; the girls Papier-mâché and dispose of his body; the girls tell Evan they're going to kill him at dawn and proceed to tear up and vandalize the house; Evan tries to knock a ceramic egg off a shelf that contains a gun but the girls accidentally knock it off and find the gun first and Evan is given one more chance to escape. He grabs a knife and runs outside only to trip and fall and be captured again by the girls.
Alright, the ending. After this whole debacle of a movie, the girls start to bury Evan with his head sticking out of the dirt, and just as one of the girls is about to smash his head with a stone, she smashes it beside him and starts laughing about how he thought they were actually going to kill him. At this point we hear about how they do this kind of thing a lot and how no one ever refuses them, these sick people spy on loving families and tear their lives apart on a regular basis. We also learn that they weren't actually underage therefore and tension that was built up when it was threatened that he would go to jail were completely fabricated. They then upload his sex video to his facebook and leave him there in the ground. This is where the funny part is, people start commenting about how sick it is that he posted that and he pulls his arm out of the dirt to try to press delete (crazy because the 'delete' and 'like' buttons are right next to each other) and he accidentally clicks like, to which he then lets out an angry yell. Then his family gets home and sees the mess, the son says "dad had a party." and the movie ends. That's it, cut to black, the end.
I've probably bored you with this review, but now you know how I felt during the viewing of this movie. 1 Star for this, especially after listening to Eli Roth's interview because he made it seem like he thought the movie was good but you'd have to be delusional to think that. Well guys, thanks for reading my first review, hopefully I get better from here, and don't see this movie if you want to have a good time. It's not even a "so bad it's funny" watch, trust me.
JVogie91 27 October 2015
Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw3344200/ |
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21-11-2019 12:57:09
