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Did a 5th grade drama class write and produce this mess? Nope, they would've done much better.
I feel so bad for Sizemore, they clearly cast him to give appeal to their B-grade film, but even he couldn't get it past the F-grade. Firstly, casting him as a scientist - with a liquor cabinet as big as the equipment shelf, was the biggest joke of all. I mean, poor guy, I'm sure he wanted to drink non stop for real, and was hoping for some action, but instead tried his best with some scientific lingo and equipment, and sitting in a chair with a walkie talkie for 95% of the film.
Then they go and drop hottie Christina Licciardi into an ice hole, so we don't get to see her after the first 5-10 mins, but instead, get to see horrible acting by amateur p0rnstar Emily Bloom trying to become an actress aka Tania Fox for the rest of the film.
But the worst, was the "award-winning for worst screenplay" mess by newb writer Ryan Ebert. It was mainly 90 minutes of treacherous back and forth nonsense plot-hole riddled scenes with the driving of two cars with 1980's quality CGI of slipping and swerving, and in a part of an airplane with the wimp boyfriend, and with Sizemore the entire time (apparently communicating with one heck of a long range walkie-talkie) with dialogue by all that, well, a 5th grader could write better. And it's not like this type of story hasn't been told hundreds of times before, all much better.
Maximilian Elfeldt's directing and editing was adequate, for a B film. The score was surprisingly bearable for a B film. The cinematography was the only decent quality - for a B film. I'm still giving it a generous 3/10, going to Sizemore, as I do feel bad he got dragged into this, and to the laughs I had for how bad this was, AND to whoever lost money funding this mess. I mean seriously, who said "that's a wrap", approved the final cut, and went to distribution thinking this will be anything above a 2/10 rating?
score 3/10
TopDawgCritic 4 April 2021
Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw6779527/ |
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19-4-2021 00:05:06