The "could'a been" scenario. (spoilers)

vertigo_14

8 Million Ways to Die was not as good as it could've been because they spend the first half of the movie with the alleged good guy and villain pretending to be too civil with one another. It never seems to get anywhere and you have a hard time believing that the slick drug dealer is up to no good, or that the lush private eye wants to do anything to stop him.

This is the story of an alcoholic cop (Jeff Bridges) who got kicked off the force after a sting operation went wrong and he shot an unarmed assailant. (Although, one might not think it too bad, though, that he did shoot the guy since he was nearly stabbing his partner to death and it was the only way the cop could stop him in time). Now, a sort of freelance private investigator, his help is sought by a friendly prostitute who seeks his protection because she wants to quit the business. And, she is willing to pay him a hefty sum. It hardly seems like good enough reason for her to later wind up dead, which is what happens, since her "pimp" really doesn't seem to mind that she's made this decision. In fact, he feels a little hurt that she didn't tell him herself.

Well, having just lost a friend, although we might seem to think the private investigator only new her very briefly, he is sure that someone was pursuing her, and he wants to figure out who and why. This guy hardly seems stable enough to keep going on with the police work, since every time something traumatic happens, he falls into a drunken, depressed stupor. Eventually, he hooks up with the hooker's friend (Rossanna Arquette), a sort of doppleganger, in that she is both naughty and nice (but shakes off the naughty after she gets to know the guy), who doesn't seem at all bothered to help him out, even though she thinks he is responsible for the woman's death at first. He also employs the help of the woman's "pimp," a pretty decent guy for a fellow who runs a prostitution business, and he's willing to help out because he knows the drug dealer (Andy Garcia) that the investigator suspects is responsible for the girl's death, is really a vicious fellow, even though he never really shows it.

There is not really enough solid character development, everyone appears a little too "off" to be those kind of characters, and the movie tends to drag on at points, especially in feeling obligated to develop some sort of relationship between the cop and the hooker's friend, but, if you're willing to forgive that much, then you might at least have a little lazy day entertainment with a semi-decent action movie. Open a can of 80s cheese and enjoy.

score 5/10

vertigo_14 31 December 2004

Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw0991570/