Buckle Up, Satan. It's Going to be a Bumpy Night.

LanceBrave

In the year 2000, "The Exorcist" was released to theaters in an extended cut, advertised as "The Version You've Never Seen." This was mostly a stunt but it successfully introduced one of the best horror films of all time to a new audience. The same year, I recall seeing advertisements for a Showtime TV movie called "Possessed," based off the "true events" that inspired "The Exorcist." Yes, this was a movie based on a reportedly true story that inspired a better known movie. For some reason, the movie always stuck in the back of mind. I seem to remember some decent reviews at the time. For years, I assumed it was a better-then-average TV movie. Finally seeing the movie now, I can see that isn't true. "Possessed" is a cheesy, melodramatic made-for-television schlock-fest.

In the early 1950s, a little boy named Robbie begins to act erratically. He's using profanity and misbehaving at school. Bloody gashes and cuts appear on his body. Most alarmingly, he gains the ability to move things with his mind. The boys' parents don't know what to do, quickly turning to the local Catholic church. A troubled priest named William Bowden, and his student Raymond McBride, becomes involved. Bowden quickly begins to believe that the boy is genuinely possessed by a demon. He asks for an exorcism. Though the local bishop is reluctant to approve the ritual, he eventually gives them the go-ahead as long as it stay secret.

"Possessed" is simply not a very good horror movie. It's attempts to scare are obvious, ham-fisted, and poorly constructed. When Robbie first begins to display unusual behavior, he telekinetically slides his desk around his class room. The effect is hokey and overdone, generating laughter instead of chills. Later, he spins a chair in his living room around on its leg. This, too, is ridiculous looking and badly constructed. "Possessed" goes for the hackiest horror clichés. The little boy has a creepy ventriloquist dummy. The story is set during Halloween. The final exorcism takes place on a dark and stormy night. The actor playing Robbie is a freckled, beady-eyed redhead, which does not make for the most convincing scares. When the time comes for the demon to make itself known, "Possessed" limply recreates the famous things "The Exorcist" did. The boy yells profanity – not even very shocking profanity – in a cheesy demon voice. He spits and vomits. Worst yet is when he makes his bed hovers or produces a giant cross out of nothing. The melodramatic score, full of stock horror shocks, does not help matters.

Starring in "Possessed" is Timothy Dalton. Dalton, the most underrated of James Bonds, plays Father Bowden. Bowden is haunted by his time in World War II when a dying soldiers on the battle field asks for his last rites and the priest ran and hid instead. The bayonet wound on his side is frequently referenced and, in the film's most overdone moments, it causes a lingering pain. Dalton gives the part his all, forcing as much of his natural charm in the rickety material as possible. It's no hope though. The character's drinking habit is the hoariest of clichés as is his struggle with his own faith. When the film calls on Dalton to directly threaten the demon, he seems to be playing it for humor. He actually tells the devil to "buckle up. It's going to be a bumpy night." Dalton appearing in schlock like this is sadly understandable but how the heck did they get Christopher Plummer to drop in on this? All his scenes were probably shot in a day but, even then, surely he had something better to do. For that matter, even Piper Laurie is above the material, during her even briefer cameo.

"Possessed" does an okay job of establishing its setting. The kid's watch "Duck and Cover" in class. Radios are everywhere. Milton Berle is referenced. Robbie reads Superman and horror comics. However, most of the film's attempts to appear timely do not succeed. Early on, Bowden attempts to break up a fight between black protesters and the racist mob attacking him. References to Hitler and World War II are sprinkled through. (The most embarrassing moment is when the possessed Robbie pretends to be an MC in hell, introducing the Fuher to the priests.) These attempts to root the movie in a specific time are heavy-handed and cheesy.

Director Steven E. de Souza previously made "Street Fighter," a movie that gets a little more leeway with me then anyone else. Maybe de Souza should have stuck with Van Damme. By blatantly inviting comparison to a cinematic masterpiece like "The Exorcsit," "Possessed" was setting itself up for failure. By filling its run time with the corniest of dime store horrors, it sets itself up for unintentional laughter.

score 4/10

LanceBrave 22 March 2015

Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw3206339/