Unwanted love child of Predator and Congo

doyourpep

Where do you begin with this movie! The movie starts with an almost entirely unrelated and totally unexplained subplot. This subplot boils down to a group of scientist found the missing link in the Caribbean, not Africa or Asia where the earliest hominids have been found. That's not at all though! The church finds out that the missing link is found and sends in an assassin (Bishop from Alien). All of this has almost nothing to do with the movie though!

The real plot begins and were introduced to five forgettable individuals. After some poor character development and attempted tension between the characters the creatures are introduced. Naturally, when the survivors' "leader" goes missing the four remaining survivors split-up because it ensures the highest chance of survival. Two people return to the beach or attempt to, but are chased and then are forgotten for the next 40 minutes. Meanwhile the two who continue searching are ambushed by Bishop. He kills some fat guy and then chases the main girl before being killed by a creature. With the creatures hot on her tail she discovers the creature have a weakness. Their infrared vision is blocked by grape juice! This is where the movie just falls apart. The main character infiltrates the creature village and searches for her boyfriend. The fate of her two friends is learned, shocker they're dead. Anyway she finds her boyfriend who has had his spine removed but is living and moving rather well for lacking a spinal cord. She smothers him to death with kisses and flees the village, creatures in hot pursuit. She has a final standoff with the creatures where we discover their bodies are the evil gorillas from Congo and their faces are from Predator, it was totally original though. She kills the alpha male and the creatures just walk off she happily leaves her Caribbean vacation and sails for home.

One thing that annoyed me about this movie they make a point of pointing out the large cranial capacity of the creatures which split from modern humans when they developed. That was 200,000 years ago, sure it took us awhile but we mastered the planet in that time and flew into the stars. These creatures who are supposed to be the closest living relatives to humans haven't even developed clothing.

score 2/10

doyourpep 15 August 2012

Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw2659438/