To live as the authentic self in the world is to die as a person of the world.
The film at the beginning shows a man who is basically incapable of letting go of the control of his destiny, of all circumstances, radically removing himself from his true self, his soul, his freedom, his soul was dead, then he goes through a little transformation throughout the film, and what died in the man at the end was his false self, his self constructed personality and image, so that his real self could come to life. Now he was facing the way out of his tunnel, to be open to and not resist all possibilites. The film's slow pace and meandering style showing all kinds of things that may not seem important to anything in the film beautifully reflects in a poetic way the openness to all possibilities the viewer himself is meant to face as well, just like Bobby at the end of the film, when he's coming out of the tunnel of his own self imprisonment.Come out of that tunnel and you'll feel this film speaking messages in hidden or subtle ways. That's what life is about. To be open to all possibilities means no expectations and control of all things to come. The trust in the universe comes with the death of our manufactured self, the woman dying in the film was like a message to Bobby Deerfield, like a mirror of his own death he had to face to become born again. Life and death is part of the whole, to fear death is to fear life.
Some could take this film as a message to motor racing these days as well, or any sport or part of life, how too much protection can take away from life, it kills the human spirit. People seek danger so they could feel at that orgasmic crossing point between life and death so they could feel alive.
This film was reflective of my own healing, I was going through disabilities and challenges of my own physical body. Years passed and one day at that time I decided to stop feeling sick, to get myself out of the prison of my mind, and miraculously what happened is that my body started getting back in shape, and at the end I was becoming more connected, more open, exuberant. I stopped seeking explanations, or the truth, I was open to mystery that is life.
I am open to my crazy self now, I let it all come as it may, I live like never before. That is what I took from the experience this film was for me at one time. I can't say this film did it for me, this film was a sign, a divine reminder, a portrayal of the theme and feeling I adopted in my own transformation.
score /10
Ascendingsun 8 October 2019
Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw5172280/35743
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