"But we're Japanese children - we can go anywhere and do whatever we want!"
**spoilers**That statement pretty much explains the sum of the plot.Unlike "Prince of Space", which if nothing else is enjoyable on a camp level, "Invasion of the Neptune Men" is painfully awful.
The film involves FIVE annoying Japanese children in short-shorts with EVEN WORSE ACCENTS than the kids in "Gamera" and "Prince of Space" combined. If that's not painful enough, the "Suppository Men", aka the Big Lugs From Neptune ("Could you help me get this thing off my head?") surround the annoying kids and begin to strangle them.I thought - okay, not a very long movie, and not very charismatic heroes, but still, it's over before it got too painful.Well . . . no.Space Chief (played by Sonny Chiba!) (imagine Prince of Space with a buzzsaw on top of his head) stands-off the Neptune Men, and jumps around trying to hit them but failing.He must have a pretty strong chop, though, because the shock waves generating from his feeble kicks cause the Neptune Men to fall down without even being touched.
Unfortunately, after a strategic retreat by the Neptune Men, Space Chief, lame though he was, disappears conviently for the next forty-five minutes. All of the other points have been pretty well covered by other reviewers.
The MST3K was good but not great, though they got off some good lines.
And BTW, WHY do they show the same freakin' stock footage over and over again???The Hitler Building was amusing, but seeing a building explode FIVE TIMES (I counted) (plus the looped battle sequence at the end) is horrible.Avoid, avoid, avoid, and watch "Prince of Space" again with "A Case of Spring Fever" for an ENJOYABLE camp experience.
Three stars for "Invasion of the Neptune Men" (enough laughs to keep me from giving it a one); eight for the MST3K version.
"Space Chief failed miserably/and tried to cover up his shame!"
score /10
Hancock_the_Superb 6 May 2003
Reprint: https://www.imdb.com/review/rw0075727/35653
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